Latino after all

It’s indescriptible how far you can get when listening to the songs you love, right?

Sometimes you even get stuck by them only due to their rhymes – when you have no idea what the lyrics say. Because it’s either some language you don’t speak or because some other factors like strong beats and long melodies, won’t don’t let you understand properly.

Have you wondered what factor stands out over the other? like, what’s more important to you, lyrics or the rhyme of a song. And whatever it is, you know it’s able to ruin the rest.

However, it doesn’t always happen. There’s an extra factor that provides you an extra paddle to keep rowing the boat to the bank! And that’s called a memory.

So memories make our songs glow regardless lyrics,creepy screams and sounds. And that… that is a miracle.

So yeah I’ve been taking some time to listen to the songs I shouldn’t be listening to whatsoever. You see, my favorite band so far is Metallica; I also love Therion,Haggard,cradle of filth and so on. I’m not saying I’m that guy.. you see him? There! crossing over that dark lonely street with his darkness lying ahead.

No.

I also love backstreet boys and proudly, Michael Jackson. But the point is … I’ve got somehow my kind of music clear, so when I listen to this song, or this one why am I suddenly singing? and I should mention that, I hate merengue in general.

And the answer is memories. I loved my childhood; that was the best feeling ever and so, there are certain songs I grew up listening to, and that makes me love them, not in the same way I love Metallica…

but even better.

Family

Hi world!

Today was my mom’s birthday, but I didn’t feel it like a special day though. We never strive ourselves enough to make something right as a family. Taking apart the nice pie, the family gathering on the bed and the Michael Jackson’s special program on Sony Entertainment Television; I did not feel right.

Maybe it’s just me; maybe I’m over reacting the fact of lacking of the spicy part we once had, but I could tell my mom didn’t enjoy this much.

It’s so frustrating when I hesitate about wishing her a happy birthday! and it’s not only me; it’s hard for my sister to be polite and kind when she’s required to. And our relationship with our parents is not bad at all. I know we’ve been through taugh moments lately, mostly by focusing on my sister’s troubles with her depression and her need (which has become our need too as a result of having dealt with her for so long) to get graduated from med school. She, indeed, made it! she’s getting graduated next month or so, but I’m pretty sure she won’t be able to work as a doctor without having overcome her chronic depression first. That is if there’s some way to do so, because by now, none medications are working out. I think she’s not on medication right now by the way.

I have no idea what’s going to happen with my family; I don’t know if I’ll get strong enough to fight for my own benefit: getting my family altogether as it’s supposed to.

However, it seems like I don’t love people as much as I seem out to. What if I don’t love anybody at all? what’s love anyway? – I say I love my dad and mom but the truth is I never make an effort to please them – I don’t do favors to anyone! I’m too selfish and I live contradicting myself as I go on – like now.

Like now cause all this damn blog has been about how much care and love I give to the people who’s around me. Do my principles depend on what day it’s today? am I that unstable?

I am unstable, but it didn’t have to affect anyone else but me!

Right now, I dislike most people. I think I’m hitting the nail on the head; the people that’s around me are something I couldn’t live for,rely on,stick up for.

FUCK!

ssshhh!

Funny how everybody seems to know what’s the right thing to do, the proper thing to say, the correct procedure, and every little f***ing detail of how to live life the easiest way possible. There’s a catch though — everybody knows what and how and why, save for the little overlooked fact that it can NEVER be their own life. It’s like asking a doctor to cure himself, it’s always easier when it doesn’t have to be your own.

So I guess everybody knows that whatever and how much they know isn’t really worth anything at all.

Loss

Where has my imagination gone?

I think I’ve lost things about me. Some time ago, I used to write anything that would catch my attention and make it something really interesting after taking a bunch of perspectives on the table and then analyse them. Since some years ago, my life hasn’t been involved in that odd adventure I used to live with when being a child; lots of risks all over the place, bruising halts as consequence of my immature behavior when facing anything.

All of that is gone and I don’t know why!

I think my life has let up after being unconscious of my life for some time in my teens. Not actually unconscious of my life, but rather than selfless I’ve been acting like a given up person. Like after looking over the life I have always wanted, after not receiving what I crave for, I just stopped searching for more and that’s pretty much what happened.

Where did it go?

Up my alley right now, I think it’s time for a shaking.

Having said that, there’s nothing else to do but looking for more. I have to encourage myself so I can realize I’m just starting to live with all my desires on the top being willing to be trapped by this guy – by me!

I’m looking forward to stopping myself from calling a halt in my life, I know I can do this better. Just wait a second..

Doggie account

In the mornings, what I hate the most is my dogs’ barking; its rumble is rather something distressing. After being disturbed, all I want to do is pound them away. At any rate, after I’m wide awake I think I couldn’t get to love my dogs more.

Zeus ‘n Scott

Even though I don’t have a current picture of them together, Scott hasn’t grown up as tall as I thought he would. He looks like his mother, really stylish for some reason, but shorter than my expectations (you’re latino after all).

Today my uncle brough Toby, his dog home. I didn’t look very welcoming to him. He had been living here for a couple of weeks on christmas, that’s why. I didn’t quite like it, mostly because I always had to take him for an extra walk in the mornings and evenings. So after my uncle took him away I thought he’d never come back for holidays.

But he did.

And I thought I’d hate this once again. But for some reason his childish behavior has suddenly slacked off and now he seems out to be slowed down, just like a boring dog watching his days passing by whilst he waits for something.

At first, Scott started mucking him regardless Toby’s patience. I don’t really know what happened, but as soon as we came back home after being at my grandma’s the whole afternoon, leaving the three of them alone; they were just getting along once again.

Welcome back Toby!